Love is all we need

All we need is love right? If we love each other, we can overcome all difficulties, all problems, all crisis, right didi? she asked with wonder in her beautiful eyes.

Didi would know. After all she had married for love, inspite of jiju not being so rich, not fulfilling their parents criteria of a perfect husband.

Her didi looked at her, started saying something and stopped herself. She is young right now. She looks at the world with rosy eyes. In some years, life will teach her that love is not that pink she imagines it to be. Love is not the answer to everything. Just like it taught her.

She was crazy about him and had the same views about love as her baby sister. He was still struggling and getting by. Marrying him would mean sacrificing all the luxuries of life she was used to. Yet, it did not stop her. Love will take care of everything, she thought. And it did initially. As years passed by, life started becoming mundane. There was space for everything but love. The face he used to praise to the moon had started becoming boring for him. There were subtle and not so subtle hints of another woman. There was no romance left in their life. Her thirst for intimacy had drawn her to another man’s arms.

Yes sweetie, she replied. All is required is love, she smiled and hugged her baby sister.

Life

Life was becoming rough,
Everyday had become tough,
It seemed I had lost it all,
And happiness had taken a fall,
Lived a dream for many years,
And then it left me in tears,
I was left with no hope,
Every moment was difficult to cope,
But now it is the end of that phase,
Now only happiness is what I chase,
Doing what I love to do the best,
Enough time to play, Enough to rest,
Bike Rides & Night Out,
Outstation trips without a doubt,
Weekend Mornings for a game of Cricket,
Evening time with a movie ticket,
Meeting friends all old & New,
Staying up until the morning Dew,
All these things I had missed a lot,
A few good lessons that life has taught,
Life has its own Ups & Downs,
Sometimes u laugh & Sometimes u frown,
It’s no good reason to live in the pasts,
Live your life till the time it lasts!

– Sujit Shetty

Lessons of 2015

No, changing of a year does not mean just a change of date. If you think carefully, every day teaches us something and we change every day. A new lesson learnt, a bad experience avoided, an opportunity grabbed.

My lessons for 2015:

✽ Save Electricity. Save Money.

✽ Don’t waste energy in pointing fingers at others. Rather use that energy to be a better person.

✽ Never ever do what your heart doesn’t agree with.

✽ Stop reacting to everything.

✽ Focus on beautiful things in your life. Forget people who hurt you.

✽ Don’t feed attention beggars.

✽ If you are angry with someone, imagine slapping them non stop cartoon style.

✽ Respect your own worth even if other people don’t.

✽ Never stop believing in your dreams. if you don’t, universe won’t.

Not just a wishlist!

So many books to read / blogs to write / places to travel to / movies to watch to / music to listen to and so little time!

There are reasons I haven’t made any bucket list. A. I am too spontaneous to go with a planned list. B. Don’t want to spend my life ticking off items to complete. You can read more here: Kick The Bucket

But there are certain things I really want to do in this life and would be happier to see all the items checked.

✎ Be kind

✎ Bring smile to someone who really needs it

✎ Change someone’s life for better

✎ Not give up on dreams

✎ Not to seek validation from anyone

✎ Be more forgiving

✎ Be brave and face fears upfront

✎ Not to indulge in self pity

✎ Talk less and listen more

✎ Live every moment

✎ Love. Just love with all my heart

Its my life, not a drama stage. I will not seek audience. I will live for myself.

Small Joys!

Everyone is waiting for that big thing to be joyous & ecstatic. A promotion, wedding, baby, or even falling in love! ❤ 😀

In this process, however, we forget to cherish the small joys of life. We take them for granted even. When you are feeling low, just list them out & see how blessed you are!

❤ Being healthy

❤ To be able to sleep for 8 hours

❤ To be able to taste food without the guilt of getting fat / sick

❤ To get compliments for looking good, cooking, dressing up well, etc

❤ To get compliments without any reason

❤ To be wished good morning with a kiss from special someone

❤ To receive a good morning text from special someone

❤ To be in someone’s thoughts

❤ To be able to dance in the rain

❤ To feel sunshine on your face

❤ To be able to see flowers blooming

❤ To smell the sweet fragrance of flowers

❤ Satin bedsheets

❤ To fit into a dress you love

❤ To get kissies from babies

❤ When a baby smiles at you

❤ Gardening.. filling your hands with mud

❤ To give a street urchin chocolate & see his face beam with joy

❤ Receiving gifts without occasion

❤ Gifting something without occasion

❤ Morning Walks while listening to chirping of birds

❤ Evening walks while listening to music

❤ Gossiping with sister

❤ Learning Recipes from Mom

❤ Discussing politics & mythology with dad

❤ Listening stories from grand parents

❤ Watching your favourite show right in the middle of a busy week

❤ A stranger smiling at you

❤ Blowing bubbles

❤ Crushing bubbles on a bubble wrap

❤ Getting comments on your blog 😉

The list seems to be endless isn’t it? There are more things to be happy about then we know.

Do share your list 🙂

Have a happy day! 🙂 🙂 🙂

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Live every moment!

I will do this tomorrow!

I know this was my new-year resolution but there are still 3 months for the year to end!

We can still do stuff together. Marriage / Moving doesn’t have to change things!

How many times have we said this to ourselves?

This is what our problem is. We think we have enough time. Time to do everything that we want to do, whenever we want to do.

BREAKING NEWS!! No!! we don’t have enough time! Time is slipping away like sand! Tomorrow never comes. Months fly in a blink. And priorities change after marriage / moving to another city / switching jobs.

The only available moment is NOW! Now or Never! Remember this.

✔ Start working on your resolution

✔ Take that walk you promised yourself

✔ Spend time with your family

✔ Go out with your friends

✔ Take a vacation

✔ Click a lot of pictures

✔ Eat what you love

✔ Write letters

✔ Change your job

✔ Tell someone you love them

Don’t wait for the perfect moment. Life will be over before that moment arrives. Make this moment a perfect moment for yourself!

 live in the moment

 

 

How are you?

How are you? (A Standard Question)

I am fine. I am okay. (A Standard Lie)

Lie, because we are not fine / okay sometimes. Poisonous thoughts are eating away our peace of mind.

The person we thought was special is not aware of our existence.

We thought we were special to them. We are, but so are 1500 others.

The connection we had was only a figment of our imagination.

Distance with people who were close earlier is troubling us.

Someone has gone from our life & the thought that we won’t ever speak again is killing us.

It is difficult juggling house work & office work.

Everyone expects us to be perfect & it is impossible to live up to their expectations.

I am mad because I don’t really want to work on weekends.

So on & so forth.

What would happen if you get the right answers? You would be judgemental. You would make lots of pity noises. You would go on giving pep talks / motivational talks. Or you would be plain indifferent.

But you know what? Nobody needs this. The correct response is understanding / empathy, a hug maybe & an ice cream tub definitely!

icecream

Fall in Love! See the Magic!!

Feeling Down? Fall In Love!!! It will lift your spirits 🙂

This is my most favourite, self made quote.

When you are touched by love, everything seems beautiful & magical.

You are at the happiest, humming love songs & day dreaming.

There is a special glow on your face that makes you feel more beautiful & gets you more attention.

Life feels worthy of living every single moment.

But here’s the catch. You don’t have to fall in love with someone else to feel all this.

Once in a while you need to see your true self in the mirror & smile & fall in love with you!!

love

Feel Lovely Not Lonely!

I feel lonely lone lone lone lonely!

Waking up on a holiday & realise you have plenty of places to go & no one to go with?

On the middle of a busy day you want to just take a break & talk away with someone?

In the night when feeling a bit mushy & find no one special to talk to?

That urge of hugging someone when life overwhelms & no one around?

This is what loneliness is. Sometimes it hits you like a gushing water fall. Sometimes it becomes a part of your living. Solitude is desirable. Loneliness is not. It brings hell lot of negative emotions & doesn’t allow us to live life fully.

It is easy to say & difficult to live but you need to get rid of the nagging feeling before it devours you.

How? you would ask.

I am no expert. But I have lived it & still trying to get out of it. Just sharing some of the things that helped me.

1. Don’t berate yourself: Do not let loneliness fill you with inferiority complex. Realise you are a fabulous person. Born to make a difference. Everyone is created with a purpose. You are not useless.

fab

2. Get Busy:  Join a hobby class. Sports club. Gym. You will meet like minded people & also you will have a distraction from negative thoughts. You could even start your own hobby classes. What better way to use your gifts!

hobby

3. Don’t fall in the pit of self pity: Whenever you feel you are wallowing in self pity. Stop. Take a deep breath & get involved in some physical activity. Take a walk. Go for some veggie shopping. Clean your wardrobe. This will freshen you up!

clean

4. Date yourself: Take a book & go to your favourite cafe. Read while enjoying a hot cup of coffee. Note down your observations. Have material for your blog / journal / diary / novel.

cafe

5. Be Social: Call people you haven’t in a while. Visit relatives who are close to you. Have a gossip session with your friends.

gossip

6. Be Good Company: Your loneliness makes you value good company. Be that yourself. Help out people whom you know are lonely & nowhere to go. Visit orphanages / old age homes & gift your time. Help others to help yourself.

orphan

Moral: You have to be your own knight. Rescue yourself. Make Efforts. And you won’t feel lonely anymore. Not for long time at least. 🙂

 

The Last Selfie!

She took her seat in the auto, kept her bag on the side & tied the scarf to her head. After her brother in law had commented that her hair looked like sunflower, she had started taking a little bit care of her hair. Caring reminded she also needed to cover her eyes. Last time she had been on that road, dust & smoke had entered her eyes making them weepy & irritable. She put on the glares & took a look at her self in the auto’s mirror. Satisfied, she put on the ear phones & listened to her favourite numbers to make the ride enjoyable.

Apart from listening to music, she was looking at her niece’s pictures in the phone album, Face booking & tweeting. Still the ride seemed long today. The traffic was too much & her mind impatient. Bored, she resorted to the one thing which she was obsessed with nowadays. Taking a selfie & uploading for everyone some kind people to appreciate.

Couple of compliments & a few likes were worth the effort. She was beaming with happiness when all of a sudden she saw a truck approaching towards the auto & hit it with full force. She closed her eyes expecting the inevitable. The only thing that were in her mind were her niece & a cupcake she longed to eat.

She heard loud screams of a man & she opened her eyes. She hadn’t died. Infact she wasn’t even injured seriously. The auto had been just dented. Probably her weight had counter balanced the force of the truck. There were some advantages of being overweight she thought.

She realised though you never know which is the Last Selfie you take.

She also realised life is too short to wait for someone to eat the cupcake with 😀

DSC_0053

 

Let’s change the world! Not.

Changing the world is every idealist’s dream. Everyone knows what is wrong with the world & only if they had powers, they would go & make everything right.

Problem is The Right World is a very subjective thing. What is right for one idealist might not be right for another & if everyone got freedom to change the world, there would be utter chaos. Just like if God granted everyone’s wishes.

I am no idealist and neither a crusader. I can only see what is wrong with me & try to change that. As cliched as it may sound, changing myself would make the world a better place, probably only for me. But then everyone who took up that task, would have a better world, isn’t it?

Try to be kind & compassionate towards others. Try to spread love rather than hate. Let people remember you for what a good person you were rather than saying good riddance when you are gone.

I pledge this. Would you like to join me in making this world a beautiful place to live in?

 

Let us be Happy!

We all are so different from each other but one thing is common. We all seek happiness. We all want to be happy. More often than not we seek happiness from someone else. We think X or Y should do something to make us happy. But that is inviting blame games. That is escaping from our responsibilities. If we need to be happy, it is our responsibility that we do things that make us happy.

Let us not wait for others to make us happy.

Let us admire the beauties of nature & soak in its wonder.

Let us listen to our favourite music & hum the tunes.

Let us pet a kitten or puppy or a baby 😉

Let us indulge in luxurious showers 😀

Let us learn something new.

Let us try something different.

Let us savour all the various flavours life has to offer!

Let us change what we can & let go of the rest!

Let us strive to be the best we can be!

Let us make ourselves HAPPY!

happy

Dance with the Butterflies!

We are living in an era of marketing. Marketing ourselves. We need to sell ourselves in order to get ahead in life, be it professional, personal or social.

One of the requisite of selling ourselves is to speak in public. And sadly, this is the one thing which many of us fear from. The fear of speaking in public makes us tongue tied & nervous wreck.

before

In my school days I used to be very enthusiastic. I did not have any qualms in speaking in public. I always used to take part in Elocution competition, Debates & even singing competition in spite of me not being a very good singer 😉

But then life changed its course. I was not myself & inferiority complex had set in. Let alone speaking in public, I used to shy away speaking to anyone. I was almost living a life of a recluse.

Life keeps taking turns & I once again found myself in public eye. There was no escaping public speaking now. I remember there were some changes in our Project structure & we had to introduce ourselves to the team in a team bonding session. When it was my turn, I gave my introduction but I was shaking a lot & had rested my hands on the glass table. At one point, I thought the table would break out of sheer pressure. I was that nervous. This happened couple of times & it made me really worried.

Working in a BPO ensures that there are several training programs conducted to improve your skills. Fortunately I was part of a Personality Development Program (No, my awesomeness is not related to any training program 😉 ) I asked the trainer about my fear of public speaking & the remedy to correct that.

He gave me the best advice. He said practicing in front of mirror is futile as you know you are speaking to yourself. If you want to overcome that fear you have to face that fear head on. Take as many opportunities you get to speak in public & you will gain confidence automatically.

I followed his advice to the T. I never shied from the opportunities that came in my way & I sometimes created opportunities as well. (No, I am not using this advice to overcome my fear of dogs, ok? 🙁 )

One more thing I learnt is if you know the subject well, you have won half the battle.

I am still not an excellent public speaker, however, I can rate myself as above average. I have become pretty good in giving presentations, at times without notice & at times without any preparation. But that doesn’t mean I don’t get nervous. I still get butterflies in my stomach. But these butterflies don’t stop me from taking the bulls by the horn 😉 Instead, I dance with the butterflies 🙂 🙂 🙂

Businessman Smiling and Pointing - Isolated

Hold On!

There have been several turning points in my life where I thought I had lost everything & didn’t have the will to live.

I have attempted to take my life several times hoping death will be an end to all the struggles in life.

Thankfully, those attempts were not successful due to several reasons. Suicide is never an easy task. Maybe I wasn’t brave enough or Maybe my sub-concious wanted me to live.

Today I look back & realise that life is wonderful. with all its flaws, all it’s struggles. A bad day or a bad relationship do not mean a bad life. I am glad those attempts failed. Now I am living life to the fullest hoping that when it all ends naturally, I would be content that my life was not a total waste.

And I would like to tell that younger foolish me several things. Things which will make her come out of the abyss of despair. Write her little notes of encouragement. While doing this, I will also hope to get encouraged today 🙂

♥ Yes, you are changing homes, you are changing schools. You will never see your old friends again. But it doesn’t mean you can’t make new friends.

♥ Keep writing. You will be a writer one day. Don’t tear off your ramblings! You will want to read them some day.

♥ Don’t be foolish to lose focus of what you want to be.

♥ People will make fun of you, if you allow them to. Don’t let it deter you from living your life.

♥ Today you are alone, you don’t have anyone to talk to. But there is a revolution in offing. Things will change.

♥ Never give up on your dreams. Your dreams are given to you to be cherished, nurtured & turn into reality.

♥ You will love, you will get hurt. But your wounds will heal. Don’t let the hurt scare you from falling in love.

♥ You are beautiful. Don’t let comments of stupid people make you believe otherwise.

♥ You are a survivor. You will survive & you are gonna amaze yourself one day.

So, Hold on. Hold on for an amazing life. Hold on & throw away the dangerous things. Hold on & continue your journey with your head held high!

walk alone

Smile & make this world beautiful!

It’s so good to see your smiling face!

Your smile is an inspiration to us!

When I see your smile, I forget my troubles for sometime!

These are some of the compliments I have received (Not bragging, ok? 😛 )

When I smile, I smile from my heart. A smile that reaches my lips & eyes & glows on my face. I may not be pretty or hot but I know my smile makes me beautiful. (Again not bragging 😉 )

It is not that I have everything I want in life & that is making me happy.  I love being happy. I love making others happy. I had a moment of epiphany & chose this to be the purpose of my life.

Over the years I have realised life is not going to be a bed of roses always. There would be thorns who would prick you, hurt you & make you bleed & cry. But that shouldn’t deter you from loving life. The imperfections of life make the journey more interesting. The lows in life make you look forward to the next high.

Also, when you are in the darkest phase of your life & get no light from anywhere, you realise the importance of people who cheer you up. People who make you laugh even when you don’t want to smile. I want to be that person. I want to be a shoulder you can lean on. I want to be the person you want to hug when there are only walls around. I want to be the person who will make you smile & laugh. I want to be the person who wants you to believe life is wonderful!

If I can achieve this, my life will not be an empty shell. My life will have some meaning.

Let’s make this world a beautiful place to live in. With a simple smile 🙂

DSC_3663

Keep Calm & Don’t Be Angry!

Everyone wants peace & tranquility in their life.

But there comes a time in everyone’s life, for some often,  for some daily & for some rarely, that you tend to lose your cool. Crowd, Noise, Hormones, Stupidity, Stress anything can trigger your temper.

1

When we are angry, we lose control of ourselves. We also lose control of our tongue. We say something which we would invariably regret later (Of course there are exceptions).

I too have been victim of this anger. Saying things which I didn’t mean, hurting myself, hurting others with words. Though I have not achieved sainthood yet, but have found ways to keep calm & not be (or at least seem) angry.

The ways to curb the anger is not rocket science. Google & you find them anywhere. I will still share points which I implemented & they have helped me a lot!

1. Drink Water: Water is the best calming agent. Take slow sips till you feel less flustered. It gives you time to think your reaction.

water

2. Don’t react immediately: Whenever you are angry, don’t make a mistake in reacting immediately. Think over what the person is trying to say. Think from all the angles. Think whether it is really hurtful. Think before you speak works best during this time.

think

 

3. Get Advice: Anger muddles your thinking power. Get advice from someone you trust. This is the time you need a friend. Friend who will show you the correct path. It can be your parents / siblings / best friends. Sometimes even co workers can give you good advice. Some corporates also have consultants now a days to help you vent out. Taking advice is not a bad thing, remember that 🙂

advice

 

4. Divert yourself: Listen to music. Walk off your anger. Have some good food, sweets preferably. Read some forwards. Smile in the mirror. Whatever it takes to take your mind off the thing which made you angry.

divert

 

5. Write down your feelings: This is the best thing that worked for me. If I am extremely upset, I write it down. I tweet my feelings or just write it down on paper if it is not tweet worthy. I have realised writing down my feelings reduces their intensity.

writing

 

6. Say sorry: Last but not the least. Even after you know what to do when you are angry, you might not follow all these steps sometimes. It is ok. We are humans. We are allowed to fail. Don’t be harsh on yourself. If you have been rude to anyone due to anger. Say sorry.

sorry

 

2011 taught me..

 

2011 by far was the most eventful year for me in recent times.. It taught me some valuable lessons.

2011 taught me:

1. Fractures are really painful and it is not about cool casts..

2. Valentine’s Day is about love..Give some to yourself too..

3. Birthdays are special when people you love make them special for you..

4. When you are friends, there are no labels..brothers, sisters, cousins, online friends, blog friends, train friends.. Friends are Friends.. And it is always good to meet them..

5. Some months would be exciting..but some months would be just plain routine..

6. Social Networking sites are not only for time pass.. It is also a good platform for networking and make good friends.. and also learn new things..

7. Some people enter our life from nowhere and change your world for better..life would be incomplete without such people…

8. When your bond is strong with someone, it can never break with distance and you can catch up where you left whenever you meet..

9. When you are facing a rough patch in your life, there would be friends who would be your support system & make you laugh even if you don’t want to smile..

10. And most important to have faith in God. Even if no miracle happens, praying definitely calms your mind..

11. It is life..not bed of roses always..you will get hurt..accept that..

12. Some memories are very precious..which are never to be shared with anyone. They are tagged in your heart forever

13. Don’t be serious always. Some craziness is required to remain sane. And it is necessary to have friends understand that craziness..

14. Most important never to lose your enthusiasm & hope..

15. Smile. It brightens your day as well as day of people around you..

16. Don’t wait for something special to happen to you – Go & Make it Happen!!!

 

Why it didn’t work out?

 

People say that when someone or something goes out of our life, we should let it go..

It means something better awaits us..

Isn’t it basking in superiority complex? Who knows who deserves what?

Who knows what was taken from us was the best or not?

Don’t think something better awaits..

Because what happened at that moment was the best that happened to you!

Know that what did not happen was only because it was not meant to happen!!

Hurdles? What Hurdles?

 

Life is never a smooth sail for everyone.

Every once in a while we will face hurdles on our path.

Some we can easily cross over but some will stop you on your tracks.

Whenever this happens, remember:

When a hurdle is placed on your path, be like a river, flow over the hurdle..

If you can’t then change the path of your flow!

 

Life is…

 

You are going on with your routine.. same old old..

And one day, amazingly, some things pop up out of the blue..like a long lost friend, a forgotten song, your favourite ghazal..

Life doesn’t cease to surprise!

Don’t turn completely cynical yet, give life a chance to surprise you, make you happy one moment at a time 🙂

Companions for Life!

 

The journey of life will never be a straight road..

There will be lots of ups and downs..

Some stretches would be pleasant and some not..

On some stretches you will get company and on some you will have to walk alone..

The important thing to remember is never to lose your enthusiasm and sense of humor!!