Ladies he cannot be your savior!

Let’s face it that the problem is that most of the women want a hero, a prince charming instilled with perfection. No matter how much you deny but it is true. As we grew up listening to fairy tales of the prince charming, The saviour, The super hero who has to be there to bring the perfect ending. The problem is that men are just as ordinary as women are. The illusion of relating the love life expectations to real ones somewhere brings a tremendous burden on men. In the life of every person, there is at least one person with whom we make a very deep connection. The connection at times is too deep, beyond our greatest and wildest dreams. Women are somewhere wired with the expectation of magic, absolute madness, a courageous person blessed with looks of Brad Pitt for bonus points.

Who is this saviour? Why so much obsession and fascination with the fantasy drama? Isn’t it better to keep it in stories itself and create your own instead? Men are ordinary human beings, the ones who are struggling to fulfil their aspirations, trying their best to make their life stable in every possible manner and meanwhile looking for love. You make him laugh and he makes you laugh. You share your stories and he shares his. You follow your dreams and he follows his. You experience life through him and share the hazy mornings, eventful afternoons and nights. You both follow your own philosophies. Sometimes you both agree and sometimes you don’t. Everything that makes life worth living.

It is okay that someone doesn’t always fulfill your expectations. Desires can wreck your life. There is no nobility in obsessing over something that does not exist. Desire leaves us heartbroken, it wears us out. No matter how perfect you would expect them to be, at some point or another, they will say something that you weren’t expecting them to say, they will do something that, at the time, would be terribly disappointing, and they will sometimes be harsh and mean. Some things really aren’t in our control. It is okay when someone you really love flips out on you or behaves a little irrationally. Love is a funny thing. It turns it all upside down when you don’t really expect it. It is like one day you realize that the fairy tale may be slightly different than you dreamt. The castle, well, it may not be a castle. And it’s not so important happy ever after, just that its happy right now. It is most important to notice that they are trying. It doesn’t matter that they slip. What matters the most is that they atleast try not to slip. They should also be given the room to be a little mean, and a little rude, and a little harsh, because they are after all, just like you. They also deserve a break. They can also break into a tantrum, and that is quite allright. Reality is what you allow it to be. Reality is what you choose to accept it to be. We tend to overlook things we shouldn’t and look over things we needn’t. Wouldn’t it be better if the expectations are withdrawn and they’re allowed to be themselves where you could carve out the extra ordinary out of him? Their care and their actions to prove the same isn’t the best thing which is a sole evidence of the fact that you are going to be his soul mate always.

Life is never as complicated as we, ourselves make it. After all what will bring smile home isn’t going to be diamond ring but it will be the extra work he spent in office to save little extra for it. What you really need to remember and cherish is the thought, and the effort, and the fact that they are with you.

– Sunakshi Goel